Decide to Heal

Childhood Sexual Abuse Impact Survivors Psychologically

Childhood Sexual Abuse Impact Survivors Psychologically

Sexual abuse survivors develop coping mechanisms to survive not thrive. When safety is compromised, it is imperative that survivors protect themselves. The focus is in getting away from their bodies where the abuse is taking place. Natural childhood development is compromised. The Overall Way Adult Survivors Feel About Themselves When children live in fear and secrecy, they do not have a chance to develop good self-esteem. The nature of secrecy itself is damaging; often survivors believe that if anyone were to find out, they would be repulsed. Abuse leaves no room for a child to … Read more

Emergency Stage of Remembering

Emergency Stage of Remembering Childhood Sexual Abuse

YOU CAN HEAL … IT IS PAINFUL … IT TAKES TIME … YOU CANNOT DO IT ALONE IT CAN END AS LONG AS YOU MAKE A DECISION TO RECOVER Emergency Stage of Remembering As a survivor, I can tell you it gets better with time and there is an end. At first the pain feels intolerable and impossible to believe that it will end. Once you know you are a survivor of childhood sexual abuse, whether you always remembered or had amnesia, it is overwhelming and frightening, shocking and rattles to the core. It is … Read more

Maladaptive Dissociation

Maladaptive Dissociation

I reached a point in my recovery from Incest where I understood that dissociation no longer served me. As a child it was adaptive, as an adult, it was maladaptive.

“I Want to Dare to Exist . . .”

Shauna Niequist

“I Want to Dare to Exist , and more than that, to live audaciously, in all my imperfect, lumpy, scarred glory, because the alternative is letting shame win.” Shauna Niequist

Swept Away on the Turbulent Wave of Remembering – Childhood Sexual Abuse

Swept Away on the Turbulent Wave of Remembering

Remembering is a wave of turbulence Spiraling down Believing you will die from its force Or drown in your grief over your loss of innocence Tumbling round and round Repeating over and over I was just a child At times the ride feels terrifying At times hopeless You want to rage at the injustice! How could this have happened? Will this ever end? It Will End If you don’t give up and You ride the wave to completion The immense turbulence will lessen And the once scary ride will be joyous by Lori Golden ======================== … Read more

Identifying Feelings and Knowing How You Feel

Identifying our feelings can be difficult and confusing. For a survivor of childhood sexual abuse, it can seem daunting. If you are a survivor, like myself, you have been successful in avoiding sensations in your body through dissociation, which is a very skillful way to separate from yourself. To further disconnect, you may have turned to addiction, such as being a workaholic, food, drugs, alcohol, shopping, sex, or relationships. Your body is at war with itself . . . to feel is frightening. Often when a survivor is asked what he/she is feeling, the survivor … Read more

When Teens Cry for Help: Teen Suicide and Self Harm

Recently on Instagram, a teen saw graphic images of suicide and self harm and was found dead in her bedroom after committing suicide. Her parents reported “no obvious signs” were seen. I am a Psychotherapist. One of my specialties is Post Traumatic Stress Disorder related to trauma and abuse. I am a recovering addict for 32 years in twelve step programs as well as an incest survivor. In 1977, when I was twenty seven, I tried to commit suicide by taking an overdose of pills. Luckily I was found and hospitalized in a psychiatric hospital … Read more

Healing the Shame Within

HUNGERING SOUL … HEALING THE SHAME WITHIN My shame is a cloud prison My soul cries for something it cannot see It hungers to suck love’s milk and drink music A longing too deep to fill I want to cut thru these black and red clouds And breathe every bit of life lost God, open your blue and green door Let me rest my darkness in your open fields let me rock in your ocean’s cradle let me leap with your grey dolphins Let your sun burn my shame to whiteness By Lori Golden, self … Read more