Childhood Sexual Abuse

Practicing Being Grateful: A Process of Recovery from Childhood Abuse

Practicing Being Grateful: A Process of Recovery from Childhood Abuse

I first learned about “being grateful” in Narcotics Anonymous 33 years ago. As a survivor of childhood sexual abuse, these words sounded foreign to me. I learned to suffer at a young age, which became a conditioned way of life, and it was a shadow that followed me into adulthood. In short, I had nothing to be grateful for. It took me two years to become willing to look at my resistance to being grateful because I was afraid to challenge my conditioned belief that I deserved to suffer. My unwillingness to begin being grateful … Read more

There is FEAR IN CHANGE for Survivors of Childhood Sexual Abuse: Why We Cannot Heal Alone

There is FEAR IN CHANGE for Survivors of Childhood Sexual Abuse: Why We Cannot Heal Alone

The definition of change is “become different.” It sounds simple, but it is not easy. It calls for us to step into unchartered territory without knowing what will happen. We like predictability and knowing what to expect. Before stepping into the unknown, we first have to identify how we protect ourselves. Self-protection was a life saver when suffering from childhood sexual abuse, but to grow beyond survival, we have to identify how we guard ourselves. Laying down our “protective weapons” means we are unsafe. If we lived in the war zone of abuse, we do … Read more

Ten Ways Survivors May Overcome Suffering from Childhood Abuse

10 Ways Survivors May Overcome Suffering from Childhood Abuse

Suffering is a conditioned response to abuse. Those who have suffered abuse grow up believing there is no way out, they are trapped and unable to get the abuse to stop. However, adult survivors can learn to stop being self-abusive and can develop a different way to treat themselves. They can learn self-compassion, self-love, and how to learn to be patient with their recovery. It is important for survivors to remember not only that new behaviors take practice and happen slowly over time, but also to learn to pat themselves on the back for trying. … Read more

Ten Ways Survivors Suffer from Childhood Abuse

10 Ways Survivors Suffer from Childhood Abuse Lori Golden

When people grow up in childhood abuse, suffering is a way of life. It is a conditioned response to abuse; lies, threats and intimidation are part of the landscape as well as terror, shame, and helplessness. Survivors develop core beliefs such as we are worthless, unlovable and shameful. Survivors believe they are responsible for the adult’s abusive behavior resulting in self-hatred, self-blame, and a need to punish themselves. In order to change this suffering, survivors first have to recognize the ways they suffer. Only then can the work and healing process begin. Ten Ways Survivors … Read more

Childhood Sexual Abuse Impact Survivors Behaviorally

Childhood Sexual Abuse Impact Survivors Behaviorally

Childhood sexual abuse directly impacts the way we act in all areas of our lives, particularly in relationships where the underlying fear is most prevalent … leading to mistrust of others. How Abuse Effects Relationships Often there is a confusion about love and sex or comfort and sex. Survivors may want to be nurtured, but believe they can achieve this only through sex. There is difficulty in trusting others, letting people in, being able to ask for what you need or only able to identify what your partner wants and needs. Abuse leads to the … Read more

Believing I was going crazy

Believing I was going crazy

This shows my feelings prior to my remembering the sexual abuse I experienced as a child. I didn’t know that I had amnesia so my symptoms of terror seemed crazy. I could not understand why I was so gripped by these fears particularly the paranoia of someone “going to get me.”

Childhood Sexual Abuse Impact Survivors Physically

Sexual abuse is felt as a physical assault whether or not physical contact is made. If an adult is leering children experience the effects internally as sensations in their body. In fear we hold our breath, tighten up, get anxious, numb out, deaden, feel flustered, feel tingly to name a few. Those are body sensations that are experienced while the leering sexualized assault is taking place . . . all feelings are felt in our bodies and directly effect us physically. HOW ABUSE AFFECTS YOUR BODY Sexual abuse is frightening and painful. Even when experiencing … Read more

Childhood Sexual Abuse Impact Survivors Psychologically

Childhood Sexual Abuse Impact Survivors Psychologically

Sexual abuse survivors develop coping mechanisms to survive not thrive. When safety is compromised, it is imperative that survivors protect themselves. The focus is in getting away from their bodies where the abuse is taking place. Natural childhood development is compromised. The Overall Way Adult Survivors Feel About Themselves When children live in fear and secrecy, they do not have a chance to develop good self-esteem. The nature of secrecy itself is damaging; often survivors believe that if anyone were to find out, they would be repulsed. Abuse leaves no room for a child to … Read more